March...

So its March, it means the year end of my bank is coming (busy time with long working hours) and also year-end job performance review.

I know I shouldn't, but I am hoping for a raise and some bonus. Though I was not like the shinest star, but I think I work very hard to learn things. Though I did show my disinterest in this job, I feel that I work much harder than people who entered during the same period as me. I expect at least some raise.

There's been a lot of thoughts about selling my co-op apt here in Flushing and just fly to Japan, but the next question was, what am I gonna do after I come back? I seriously have no idea. Then I was thinking about selling it, and mortgage a condo and renting it out, so at least I have a back up. But then there come two problems of lacking of fund, and lacking of people who can monitor in the condo while I am gone...

So what am I gonna do?? It is really sucks to be an adult isn't it? Becoming an adult during the crisis is even worse. Becoming an adult with a child in his heart during the crisis is the worst. Becoming an adult with a child in his heart holding a dream of heading back to Japan during the crisis is just....deadly wrong!!

I got to talk to Kevin a few days ago, which was good... he seems like he is doing well, might go to Ghana for the summer.
Went to movie with Sean, Ashley, and a co worker of mine who came back from the JET... It is interesting that I was kinda creating a clique of people who have nippon-craze. We went to watch Tokyo! and talked a little about our experience in Japan. It seems like Ash is the only one like me, feeling trapped in the US and wanting to go to Japan everyday.

As of my personal life...I have been hanging out with this kid named Kenny, whom Nihiru has met when he was dating my ex-close-friend. Things can be as innocent as it seems, or it can be as complicated as peopel surrounding us think. We went to Niagra Fall together, hang out almost every weekend, doing shit like shopping for grocery, eating out, movies, then we signed up real estate classes together, then we went to Britney Spear concert together...(oh btw, Brit is so bad, I love her!!)
So sometime I do wonder if there's sth between us. Or it could be just a sense of companionship that I am enjoying. But all in all, he is the one who have been giving me all the light and pleasure in my life recently. Without him I would really feel so lonely and depressed.

So yea...that was a lil brief update of my life lately...

TWO UPCOMING MOVIES THAT I LOOK FORWARD

oya...guilty as plead..I am a chick

Smelly Cat

It's been 10 days after New Year, I have not gone out as much as I expected.  During xmas eve, I had to OT until 8 pm, during new year eve, I didn't leave office until 830...Is my job really really demanding? It is at some level, but how come everybody else left earlier than me? 

I think I have found my workaholic gene.... I just do not want to leave office sometime, despite the fact that I don't like this job.  I have to admit I have grown a lot as a person in the past six months working there. I learned a lot of corporate loans...learn about how destructive office politics can do to a company performance, and learn that how I can be a bitch and asshole at work when others were trying to be mean at me...

I will always remember the following anecdotes...

During the quarter end, I didn't have much time to have lunch...I ran to the cafeteria with my lunch box and planning to heat it up..then a coworker of mine sitting there eating some panini that he bought for 7 dollars downstair..

"Oh Ricky..why aren't you eating your lunch?" 

"No man..too busy... I want to finish my work as soon as I can..."

"But..you won't get paid for lunch...you know that right?"

"Yea...but I really have a lot of stuff to do...very busy."

"Everybody are busy..."

"Yea I know..."

"So why are you so retarded and work so slow? "

"...."

    At that moment, my easily-frustrating self told me to give him a nice big punch on his pathetic face, because I really had no idea how to give him a come back..but my modest asian self was like "whatever...leave it...drop it..."

So I turned around and just when I was about to walk away...I bursted out "you know, not everybody are as experienced as you, still working as an administrator at this operational department even when you have hit your 30's."  

I believe he got my offensive comment...because he said "Fuck you!" 

YES...Assholes...a common breed that is unique in their every own way.  I never knew how many of these creatures I needed to deal with.  More and more of them emerged to my face after my boss asked me to do a report update, which is an assignment usually assigned to the officers.  And I am just too tired to hear or see them opening their mouths.

 Just a few weeks ago, another co worker of mine gave me a phone call 

"Ricky, piece of advice, you need to mind your own 'queue' (it is like a to-do work pages).  Don't waste your time on the fucking report that the AVP asked you to update on daily."

Then..few days later...another co workers walked by...

"Oh wow...ricky, you are so hard working...you are updating the report? Why are you doing this report? you know, no one cares about your report..."

I admit I am an aggressive achiever at work, or in any field that I involve in.  This comes with a cost of being the target of jealousy in the midst of cubicle politic.  And man, why couldn't I be bitchier..

Nicole~ you are right, I am not mean enough~ teach me to be meaner!! So I can be more eligible for law school...hahaha